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In case one semi-humorous article a day isn't enough for you, here's the list of all the Lance and Eskimo Dot Com updates from the past.
4-9-08 Hot Fun in the Early Spring: In this second (!!) article of 2008, Laura provides handy if untimely hints for keeping cool. Warning: Contains an erroneous explanation of the current U.S. credit crisis. (Laura)
4-5-08 Laura's Crush List III: In honor of the Lance and Eskimo Comix anniversary, how about an article?! (Laura)
11-29-07 Why I Don't Want an Amazon Kindle For Christmas: Chefelf takes a look at Amazon's new e-book reader, the one gadget that certainly won't make it onto his Christmas list this year. (Chefelf)
9-28-07 LittleHorse: Strangers in the Valley: LittleHorse's new album is out and it features one two three songs about Sherlock Holmes! Does it get any better than that? (Chefelf)
9-24-07 The Excuse Falls Flat: Chefelf takes a look at The View's Sherri Shepherd, her feelings on the Earth being flat, and a phenomenally poor display of back-pedaling. (Chefelf)
9-12-07 My iPhone: Chefelf just got an iPhone. He's so happy about it that he actually had to adjust the forum databalse settings a chefelf.com to increase the maximum allowable filesize in kilobytes for a text entry. (Chefelf)
9-3-07 Extinct Beverage: Hillside Coffee - Self Heating Container: Chefelf returns to his Extinct Beverage Museum to review what is possibly the most dangerous beverage he has ever consumed. It is arguably Chefelf's most daring -- and certainly his most comprehensive -- beverage review ever!
(Note: It features video where Chefelf sounds a lot more like Ira Glass than he intended.) (Chefelf)
8-27-07 My Childhood Is Better Than Your Childhood: Chefelf explores the difference in childhood entertainment over the past 30 years. Features some pretty awesome clips from Sesame Street and some not so awesome clips from another less cool children's show. (Chefelf)
8-23-07 Giant Godzilla Stripper: Chefelf reviews a commercial where a giant Godzilla-sized stripper wreaks havot on a tiny uninhabited CGI city. (Chefelf)
8-20-07 Gallagher's 2000 Strip Club Commercial: The first in a series or reviews of strip club commercials. This one features space aliens in need of a lap dance. (Chefelf)
8-14-07 Daisy May's BBQ USA Commercial: Chefelf takes a look at the commercial for Daisy May's BBQ USA, a New York City BBQ restaurant. Spoiler: It's rather incredible. (Chefelf)
7-11-07 Born From Jets: An Open Letter to Saab: Chefelf takes a look at Saab's 'Born From Jets' advertising campaign and wonders if this is something they should be bragging about. (Chefelf)
5-24-07 The Played Out List: Episode 1: BOM-Chicka BOW-WOW!: The first chapter in an unspecified number of chapters on things that have been well overdone. (Chefelf)
5-16-07 Death of a Coffee Cup: Chefelf explores what happens when his favorite coffee mug breaks and he has to find a new one. No one should have to deal with such misfortune. (Chefelf)
5-14-07 Laura Notes: Stalking Darkness: I've updated the Laura Notes page with incredibly detailed chapter summaries and increasingly phoned-in analysis of Stalking Darkness, sequel to Luck in the Shadows, which, forty days and nights later, perhaps you have finished reading! Enjoy please! (Laura)
5-10-07 Spider-Man 3: Chefelf takes a poorly-edited look at how Spider-Man 3 deviated from the story as it was originally told in the comics. (Chefelf)
5-2-07 Old Notes Which, I'm Going to Have to Face It, Will Never Turn Into Full-Scale Updates: Continuing with the whole "spring cleaning" theme. (Laura)
4-25-07 Emma IM: Jane Austen in sixty seconds! (Laura)
4-18-07 Classic IM Profiles of Ages Past: Further cleaning out of old files. (Laura)
4-13-07 Lance and Eskimo: The Webcomic: WHOA! FINALLY, a Lance and Eskimo Webcomic! I've been updating every day this week, so if you haven't seen it yet, pop by for 5 delightful one-page comics. Next week: Another full week of comics! Bookmark or RSS for further updates! (Laura)
4-11-07 That Moment of, "Oh.": Laura describes one of the perils of her self-appointed task of Cultual Homosexuality Lookout. (It's like bikini inspector, but instead of bikinis, you have boys who make eyes at each other.) (Laura)
4-4-07 Laura Notes: Luck in the Shadows: If you enjoy Laura's opinionated synopses of Boy Meets World and The Sentinel, you may enjoy this lengthy faux-academic book analysis she spent way too much time on after a week reading the strange combination of SparkNotes and pulp fantasy. At least, for awhile. Then it will get old. (Laura)
3-28-07 Crush List II: Not a replacement but an extension of last summer's list, detailing those men I've come to love since. Virtue! Sorrow! Fashion! (Laura)
3-21-07 Top Seven Annoying Retail Songs of 2004: While going through some old files I found this scrap that I'd written in 2004 featuring the Gwen Stefani non-hit, "Bathwater." The release of Gwen Stefani's new album, The Sweet Escape made me think that this would be perfect timing to discuss a song that's seven years old! Topical. (Laura)
2-19-07 The Shit Is Bananas: While going through some old files I found this scrap that I'd written in 2004 about the Gwen Stefani hit, "Hollaback Girl." The release of Gwen Stefani's new album, The Sweet Escape made me think that this would be perfect timing to discuss a song that's two and a half years old! Topical.
Warning: If you are sensitive to use of the word shit then please don't read this article.
Double Warning: Also, if you are sensitive to use of the word shit don't read the title of this article or either of the two warning messages. (Chefelf)
1-5-07 Lance and Eskimo in the Kitty House: On an archaeological dig, Laura found this unpublished Lance and Eskimo manuscript from April 2003. Other things she found while cleaning include this picture of Fashion Emergency cast with Batman villains (July 1999) and the ORIGINAL Johnny Woonsocket texts (date unknown, but judging from their level of decay, they are at least one thousand years old). (Laura)
11-23-06 The Inconsistently Detailed Episode Guide for The Sentinel, Season 1: If you like The Inconsistently Detailed Boy Meets World Episode Guide, you'll be THANKFUL (see what I did there?) for this collection of ten alternately detailed and hazy episode recaps of a charming mid-90s supernatural/cop/crap show. (Laura)
9-7-06 Bob Dylan Can Go To Hell: A look at Bob Dylan's comments on the state of modern music and how he's better than everyone and everything that's ever existed. (Chefelf)
9-6-06 Back to School Special: Linguistics Study Guide: Laura and classmate/co-conspirator Anna wax foolish about what is in fact their senior project. (Laura & Anna)
9-4-06 Extinct Beverage: Coca-Cola Blāk: With the summer coming to a close it's time to start the 2006 Summer Extinct Beverage Round Up! There are a few choice beverages that came out this summer that are certain to be headed for the halls of extinction! Chefelf has tried them all and now he begins to pretend that he'll actually review them all. (Chefelf)
8-30-06 Lance and Eskimo and the Return of the Style Bullies: Because nothing says "comeback" like ripping yourself off! (Laura)
8-23-06 Makeover Shows: A Comparative Review: Because you don't want to waste your time on just any makeover show. (Bonus: the preceding statement is also true if you remove the word "just"!) (Laura)
8-16-06 Rejected Opening Monologues for The Waltons: Slash content: 4-5% A NEW LOW! (Laura)
8-9-06 Am I the Only One Who Thought the Last Scene of Batman Begins Was Kind of Slashy?: We should probably just change the name of Laura's Journal to "Laura's Weekly Slash Blog." (Laura)
8-2-06 The "Guess the Most Popular Slash Pairing" Game: Do you have your finger on the pulse of fandom? Are you sure you want to? Research and programming assistance by Anna and Paul, respectively. (Laura)
7-26-06 Laura Reviews: Psych: Another TV review from Laura, this one of a relatively new show: USA's Psych! (Laura)
7-19-06 Laura's New and Improved Crush List: Another thing Laura has been doing a lot of lately is harping on and on about how much she loves... well, you'll see. Laura's attempt to capitalize on boy-craziness = fun for YOU! (Laura)
7-12-06 Laura's Ode to Stargate: Atlantis: Laura has been bothering everyone by writing bits and pieces about her love for this Sci-Fi original TV show on various private blogs, journals, online chats, and in-person conversations; so in order to get her precious thoughts out to a wider audience she has written the first L&E article in, like, ninety years. Enjoy it. (Laura)
3-13-06 Extinct Beverage: Metromint: Lance & Eskimo returns triumphantly from its 4 1/2 month Christmas break with a fresh new article! A beverage review? By Chefelf? It's like 2001 all over again with less Kubrick and more mint taste. (Chefelf)
10-19-05 Daytime Ads: After a(nother) five-month hiatus, Laura briefly comes out of retirement to bring you a(nother) article complaining about the commercials on TV.
(Laura)
9-26-05 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 14): The Princes' Plan Princes unite against the great dragon, Ilkspeake. (Chefelf)
9-19-05 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 13): The Battle At long last the battle between Green and Brown begins in earnest. (Chefelf)
9-12-05 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 12): The Great Fire Millipede A mysterious magical creature advances on Prince Brown and his men. (Chefelf)
9-5-05 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 11): The Armies Meet At last the armies of Prince Brown and Prince Green are united... IN BATTLE! (Chefelf)
8-29-05 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 10): Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 10) (Chefelf)
8-22-05 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 9): Prince Green and the nymph-elf Tracy on the trail of Shocker the Wizard! (Chefelf)
8-15-05 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 8): Don't believe in fairy tales. The approach on Mount Tarkoon. (Chefelf)
8-8-05 The Prophecies of Nicetradamus (pt. 1): Excerpts from the oft overlooked prophecies of Nostradamus's younger cousin, Nicetradamus. (Chefelf)
8-1-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 9): Reasons 81-92 to hate Revenge of the Sith. Due to a clerical error there are actually 92 reasons! In this stunning conclusion you will see Asthmatic Cyborgs, Princess Leia, Moff Tarkin and much, much more! This is the final Reasons to Hate article ever! Until Lucas breaks his promise and makes some more Star Wars crap for us all to hate. (Chefelf)
7-25-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 8): Reasons 71-80 to hate Revenge of the Sith. Yoda's in exile, the properties of lava, the higher ground, and crappy CGI babies! (Chefelf)
7-18-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 7): Reasons 61-70 to hate Revenge of the Sith. The wonderful Volcano planet Mustafar, the death of liberty and Obi-Wan and Yoda's terrible plan. (Chefelf)
7-11-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 6): Reasons 51-60 to hate Revenge of the Sith. It's the moment you've all been waiting for... the moment where all the Jedi finally die! And what a hunt it is! (Chefelf)
7-4-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 5): Reasons 41-50 to hate Revenge of the Sith. Laugh as Obi-Wan rides a silly lizard creature! Cry as Anakin succumbs to the dark side! Vomit as Palpatine whines like an injured puppy! Tolerate it as the origins of the Emperor's terrible complexion are revealed! (Chefelf)
6-27-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 4) : Reasons 31-40 to hate Revenge of the Sith. The Jedi being morons! Operas perfomed by water! Tragedy! The return of the midi-chlorians! And much, much more! (Chefelf)
6-20-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 3): Reasons 21-30 to hate Revenge of the Sith. Romantic dialogue, unusual pregnancy, prophecies and premonisions, the Jedi code and big stupid Wookiees! (Chefelf)
6-13-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 2): Reasons 11-20 to hate Revenge of the Sith. Ignorance of basic physics, inappropriate clowning around and mispronouncing your own wife's name! The fun continues! (Chefelf)
6-6-05 91 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (pt. 1): Every hero has a lightsaber. Every saga has an end. Every guy with nothing better to do has a list of reasons to hate Star Wars. The article that took 28 years to write is finally here. (Chefelf)
5-25-05 Why the Baby-Sitters Club Should Have Aged: If one were to make a list of the things boys care about least, the Baby-sitters Club would be pretty high up. Laura knows most of the people who look at this website are boys, but I guess she just doesn't care! (Laura)
5-20-05 The Pathetic Postcard Contest: Laura dissects what's so lame about four postcards from the RI/MA area. (Laura)
5-9-05 The Star Wars Holiday Special (Part 4): Chapters 19-27 in Chefelf's comprehensive scene-by-scene guide to the Star Wars Holiday Special. The Amorphean being, Life on Tatooine, Bea Arthur, Han and Chewie save the day and Princess Leia sings at the Life Day ceremony! (Chefelf)
5-2-05 The Star Wars Holiday Special (Part 3): Chapters 13-18 in Chefelf's comprehensive scene-by-scene guide to the Star Wars Holiday Special. Leia & Threepio, Han & Chewie, kind Imperial officers, The Jefferson Starship, and Boba Fett! (Chefelf)
4-27-05 Laura's Inconsistently Detailed Boy Meets World Episode Guide - Season 4: While you're here, I've got my thoughts on most of the episodes for season 4 of Boy Meets World entered into the database. Still a few missing, but they don't call it inconsistent for nothing! (Laura)
4-25-05 The Star Wars Holiday Special (Part 2): Chapters 7-12 in Chefelf's comprehensive scene-by-scene guide to the Star Wars Holiday Special. Saundan the space trader, Darth Vader, Gormaanda, space battles, Wookiees exchanging presents and Wookiee sex fantasies! (Chefelf)
4-18-05 The Star Wars Holiday Special (Part 1): Chapters 1-6 in Chefelf's comprehensive scene-by-scene guide to the Star Wars Holiday Special. The Milennium Falcon, Luke Skywalker, A hologramtic circus and introducing Chewbacca's family! (Chefelf)
3-23-05 Who's Your Ideal Top Gun Match?: Find out today! (Laura)
3-14-05 Chefelfs Notes: The Cat Who Walks Through Walls: A journal of my thoughts while reading "The Cat Who Walks Through Walls" by Robert A. Heinlein. Voted Lance & Eskimo's Article You Will Most Likely Not Want To Read in 2005 by the National Association of Long Winded & Unnecessary Reviews. (Chefelf)
2-7-05 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode III Teaser!: A special sneak peak at Chefelf's upcoming reasons to hate Star Wars: Episdoe III: The Revenge of the Sith. (Chefelf)
1-31-05 George Lucas 1983 - 2005: A photo essay chronicling the changes in George Lucas's film philosophy over the past 23 years. Note: This is serious stuff. Only read this if you are a serious student of film such as myself. FILM NEWBIES NEED NOT APPLY!! (Chefelf)
1-27-05 Trapped in my Cell: A bitter, unfunny screed about all the problems Laura has encountered in dealing with cellular telephone service. (Laura)
1-24-05 The Many Faces of Alan Greenspan: The man, the myth, the cyborg. (Chefelf)
1-17-05 Reasons to Hate the Star Wars Special Edition DVDs: Episode VI: Return of the Jedi gets the full "Reasons to Hate" treatment in this final installment of The Nitpicker's Guide to Star Wars: The Special Edition DVDs. (Chefelf)
12-29-04 Lance and Eskimo Lose the Refrigerator: You know how when you lose something, you look under the fridge? Well, in this first and last full-page L&E comic of 2004, our two intrepid heroes actually lose the refrigerator. (Laura)
12-24-04 Deck the Halls with Christmas Carol Ratings: Part II: The continuation of Papa Redcloud's Christmas carol assessments. This week: J-Z. (Papa Redcloud)
12-22-04 The Tale of Ginger-Barad-dur: Laura and her roommate submit an unorthodox entry to a gingerbread house building contest. (Laura)
12-17-04 Deck the Halls with Christmas Carol Ratings: Part I: Papa Redcloud turns his formidable having opinions about things talents to a consideration of 52 Christmas Carols, in alphabetical order. This week: A-I! (Papa Redcloud)
12-15-04 Lance and Eskimo Comic Strip: Logic Problem: Another Lance and Eskimo comic strip, this one featuring a joke formulated late at night by Laura and Paul. It kind of shows. (Laura and Laura and Paul)
12-8-04 Lance and Eskimo Comic Strip: Musket: A brand new L&E, this one in comic strip form. Pictures by Laura, based on something Lefty said one time. (Laura and Lefty)
12-1-04 How Christmas Stole Everything: A pleasant and mildly bitter seasonal diatribe. But it's the good kind of bitter. Like cinnamon sticks. (Laura)
11-10-04 Laura Recaps: Orfeo ed Euridice: Part II: Laura continues her description of the goofy opera. (Laura)
11-3-04 Laura Recaps: Orfeo ed Euridice: Laura gets classy so you don't have to be, offering an extremely detailed, slightly disbelieving description of an opera. Don't worry, it was on home video. And from the 70s, I think. I hope. (Laura)
11-1-04 Reasons to Hate the Star Wars Special Edition DVDs: Episode V: The second chapter in the original trilogy is finally on DVD. Was it worth the wait? Of course it wasn't! (Chefelf)
10-18-04 Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode IV: A New Hope: The Specialer Edition is out and Chefelf has turned his keen eye on the changes presented in the new DVD release. (Chefelf)
10-6-04 Goofy Couture: Laura's pants designs. Contains unreasonably large cartoon images of ladies' (clothed) butts. You have been warned! (Laura)
9-29-04 How I Spent My Summer Vacation: Almost enough time has passed that Laura's job at the office supply superstore is funny, not tragic. Almost. (Laura)
9-22-04 Art Appreesheeayshun: Laura bitches about her art text. (Laura)
9-8-04 The Inconsistently Detailed Boy Meets World Episode Guide for Season 3!: Laura's first contribution since the summer (spring-summer? winter-spring-summer?) hiatus is a doozy-- summaries, info and opinions on as many episodes of the ABC sitcom Boy Meets World, season 3 (1995-6), as she has seen. Which is most of them. (Laura)
9-1-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Twenty: "She was not sure what she would say to the man when he arrived, nor had she determined what her judgment would be. That verdict would be finally decided only when she had had the opportunity to read Ashley’s nature by looking deep into his eyes." (Papa Redcloud)
8-25-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Nineteen: "'We are not married to each other, we don’t need to be. We are not lovers, because—well we are nearly sisters and such a love would be both inappropriate and superfluous. We are Bess and George. Inseparable cousins and friends. That is a bond stronger than all others combined.'" (Papa Redcloud)
8-19-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Eighteen: "She kicked at the [thug]. When he rolled over, she got a shock. 'I recognize him!' she exclaimed. 'He is one of the gang who enslaved the young people in Carbon City!'" (Papa Redcloud)
8-12-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Seventeen: "'My waters have broken. I’m afraid that I am going to have the baby right now. I mean, where are the towels?'" (Papa Redcloud)
8-4-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Sixteen: "'I will be spotted before two days are gone, and all four of us-Hannah, George, Bess, and myself, not two speak of two unborn babies-will be in mortal peril!'" (Papa Redcloud)
7-28-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Fifteen: "Nancy was completely defenceless. Alone in company with this degenerate individual, there was no telling in what kind of trouble she could find herself. ... He might take the first opportunity to silence her forever!" (Papa Redcloud)
7-21-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Fourteen: "Nancy knew that Ashley was concealing something from her. She wondered if she should go on in this direction. Her mealtime companion was visibly squirming... But her intuition told her that Natalie was the key to this man’s character—and to his soul." (Papa Redcloud)
7-14-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Thirteen: Hannah looked around to see if there was anyone lurking in the underbrush before proceeding. "I fear that Nancy might be in some danger tonight. We need to keep her and her shady companion under strict surveillance. With my commando training I will be best prepared to intervene if the need arise." (Papa Redcloud)
7-7-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Twelve: "Bess realized that she had crossed the room, nimbly avoiding treading on the doctors outstretched body, without any trace of a hobble or any pain whatsoever. She was cured!" (Papa Redcloud)
6-30-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Eleven: "'And you are both named Bobbie Watson?' asked the doctor.
'Everyone in our family is named Bobbie Watson,' George informed him. 'That makes it easy for us to remember who we are.'" (Papa Redcloud)
6-23-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Ten: "She looked deep into his eyes, searching for that signal that would allow her to unburden what remained of her soul. What she saw there froze her blood." (Papa Redcloud)
6-16-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Nine: "'Greetings earthling! Our revered general, Yusuf Olafson, uncle and regal envoy, trusts human entities beyond every sentient terrestrial,' she intoned in her most (Bess) Marvin the Martian-like voice."
(Papa Redcloud)
6-11-04 Company X # 027: Hugh Manatee's big joke. (Chefelf)
6-9-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Eight: "Nancy moved swiftly to the sideboard. This must be Mrs. Watson, concluded the astute under-housemaid. She felt herself strangely smitten by this lady and tempted, much against her conscious will, into the gross impropriety of rushing over to kiss the lady." (Papa Redcloud)
6-4-04 Company X # 026: Hugh Manatee's big party! (Chefelf)
6-2-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Seven: "There was something not quite right about this maid's life, Nancy thought to herself as she followed the other servant down the hall. She felt as though she might really be intended for some other kind of existence. Only she could not remember it." (Papa Redcloud)
5-26-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Six: "'The truth we seek is located behind a veil that we must pull aside. For in my estimation the Christines are little more than a cover for a more secular operation. And, unless I miss my guess, that underlying operation is knee deep in crime!'" (Papa Redcloud)
5-19-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Five: "Bess panicked. 'Mr. Drew, I can't join a cult. I am a deaconess at St. John's church!'" (Papa Redcloud)
5-14-04 Company X # 025: Introducing: Trust Doggie (Chefelf)
5-12-04 Everything I Need to Know I Learned from Deoderant: Laura surfs the wide wide world of advertisement and unexpectedly learns a little about guests, travel, romance, and perhaps--herself? (Laura)
5-10-04 Company X #024: Beware the enemy. (Chefelf)
5-7-04 Company X # 023: Harry's smooth move. (Chefelf)
5-5-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Four: "Inside in a florid but trembling hand it read 'to charming Bessie, may she number the days of our friendship with gladness, Sam’l Johnson.' He had unwittingly signed over to her her own book!" (Papa Redcloud)
5-3-04 Company X # 022: Some more biscuits! (Chefelf)
4-30-04 Company X # 021: Tech Support. (Chefelf)
4-28-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Three: "On his left was Rosalyn Carter, then Oscar Wilde. Wilde was a tall, fleshy man of early middle age, who dressed after a fashion that seemed both extravagantly sophisticated and gothically juvenile. Everything about him was pressed and polished to perfection, from his enormous projecting black lapels to his crimson vest. He wore an immaculate lily in his buttonhole, and his whole person smelled like a spring garden at Eastertide." (Papa Redcloud)
4-26-04 Company X # 020: Harry Harmful... foiled? (Chefelf)
4-23-04 Company X # 019: More Harry Harmful. (Chefelf)
4-21-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter Two: "Before another second had elapsed George had it all figured out.
"'Bess! You are the father of my child!'" (Papa Redcloud)
4-19-04 Company X # 018: Introducing Harry Harmful. (Chefelf)
4-16-04 Company X # 017: Tales of Harry Harmful. (Chefelf)
4-14-04 The Prisoner of Spring Rock: Chapter One: Papa Redcloud's second Nancy Drew novel finds our heroines several years older and more experienced. Learn how much has changed as you watch them prepare for a party of Carson Drew's! Gasp as you discover the special guest partygoers! (Papa Redcloud)
4-12-04 Company X # 016: Hugh Manatee's cheese table. (Chefelf)
4-9-04 Company X # 015: Hugh Manatee orders office supplies. (Chefelf)
4-7-04 Insouciance Is My Anti-Drug: Laura presents a rather ill-timed argument that the anti-drug campaigns in grade school are pretty useless. (Laura)
4-5-04 Company X #014: A meeting of two bosses. (Chefelf)
4-2-04 Company X #013: The press conference. (Chefelf)
3-31-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 20: In the final postlude to the Nancy Drew adventure, George seeks knowledge of her friends' whereabouts following their disappearance. (Papa Redcloud)
3-29-04 Company X #012: The spelling contest. (Chefelf)
3-26-04 Company X #011: The board meeting. (Chefelf)
3-24-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 19: George picks up the pieces of her life in the aftermath of the adventure. (Papa Redcloud)
3-22-04 Company X #010: Let the lawsuits begin. (Chefelf)
3-19-04 Cowboy Comics Vol. 2: I'm pleased to announce that Brisbane central library has just as many dodgy cowboy novels as any in England! (Yahtzee)
3-17-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 18: Everything goes from bad to ridiculous as all plans go hideously wrong in this exciting climactic chapter! Don't miss it! (Papa Redcloud)
3-15-04 Company X #008: About a boy ... DOG! (Chefelf)
3-12-04 Company X #007: Introducing Hugh Manatee. (Chefelf)
3-10-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 17: Nancy is interrogated in a twisted trial of the unlawful! (Papa Redcloud)
3-8-04 Company X #006: The Great Wizard and the Water Cooler. (Chefelf)
3-5-04 Company X #005: Sweater Girl meets "Online", the Company X IT guy. (Chefelf)
3-3-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 16: Ned Nickerson arrives on the scene! (Papa Redcloud)
3-1-04 Company X #001: "Welcome to Company X" The premier of Chefelf's shockingly unimpressive webcomic. This kicks off a full week of comics! Check Monday through Friday! (Chefelf)
2-25-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 15: Bess is found, and George dons a new costume, as the three girls continue their daring undercover vigil! (Papa Redcloud)
2-23-04 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 7): In which the mighty plague on the Nymph-Elvish kingdom is revealed! (Chefelf)
2-20-04 How To Be The Biggest Idiot Alive: Heccubus presents another handy guide to becoming part of what's wrong with the world today. (Heccubus)
2-18-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 14: The secret of the mysterious drug is finally revealed! (Papa Redcloud)
2-16-04 The Return of Sauron: A conversation that took place sometime in late 2003. (J.M. Hoffman)
2-13-04 Yahtzee's Australia Journal (Chapter 2): Yahtzee continues his adventures throuh the southern hemisphere, the Australian portion at least (Yahtzee)
2-11-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 13: Having met unexpectedly in the depths of danger, Nancy recounts her thrilling experiences to George! (Papa Redcloud)
2-9-04 Star Wars :Jedi Knight 3: Jedi Academy: A review of the latest Star Wars game. Warning: This is more of a manifesto than a review. As you may be aware, Chefelf doesn't tend to be brief when critiquing Star Wars related material. However, if you intend to play this game you should really prepare yourself with this article. (Chefelf)
2-6-04 Mario: The secret hidden tale of intrigue behind the world's most famous fictional plumber. (Zach)
2-4-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 12: Deep in the gangster's lair, George meets with an unexpected friendly face... (Papa Redcloud)
2-2-04 The Adventures Of Angular Mike: Welcome to the Internet home of that loveable polygonal pioneer, Angular Mike. Here you will find the chronicles of his amazing adventures through the world of absurdity and MS Paint. (Yahtzee)
2-1-04 "U"'re Gonna Love It!: Toast, that is. Or possibly alleged college student design asthetic. (Jen)
1-31-04 Fruity Markers: Why the arts remains such an important appendage to the educational structure. (Jaques)
1-30-04 The Anonymous Blonde's First Erotic Science Fiction: Some terrible publishing house wants to make the Anonymous Blonde write an erotic sci-fi serial for them. She's doing it, because she needs the money. But that doesn't mean she's going to do a good job.
(The Anonymous Blonde)
1-29-04 Extinct Beverage: Orbitz: What if Pikachu pooped in some Pine Sol? Find out in this review.
(Chefelf)
1-28-04 Great Powerpoint Demonstrations by Villains, Part 1: Skeletor's Soliloquy: Back in the day, villains had to freestyle their gloats, or use cumbersome cue cards. But if Skeletor had access to Microsoft Office, we all know He-Man would be sitting through a lengthy PowerPoint presentation like this one. (Paul)
1-27-04 Bears!: the musical: Laura's tribute to bears, and Joey Lawrence. (Laura)
1-26-04 Quest for the Crown: Paul and Nate have developed a hot new online RPG, and you'll get to be the first to play! (Paul and Nate)
1-23-04 The Future of Lance & Eskimo: A letter to our readers. (Chefelf)
1-22-04 Overrated: Diamonds: Mama Redcloud continues the Overrated tradition with an exploration of the mythos of diamonds. (Mama Redcloud)
1-21-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 11: Continuing their valiant attempt to rescue Nancy, Bess and George descend into the gangster's lair! (Papa Redcloud)
1-19-04 Cropped Photos of Bill Gates: The internet is full of cropped photos of Bill Gates dressed as Hitler or Satan or Jerry Lewis. It's all getting really stale. Recently I fired up Photoshop to try to dilute the Bill Gates photo pool with some fresh new material. (Chefelf)
1-16-04 An Open Letter To My College's Bookstore's Website: Laura questions her college bookstore's right to make the claim "Buying Textbooks Just Got Easier..." (Laura)
1-14-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 10: Bess and George go undercover in the seedy underworld underbelly of Carbon City! (Papa Redcloud)
1-12-04 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 6): Closing in on Mount Tarkoon (Chefelf)
1-9-04 Laura's Big Book of Baby Names: Laura proves her parental unsuitability by waxing goony about names for children. (Laura)
1-7-04 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 9: Alarmed by Nancy's disappearance, her chums formulate a daring plan! (Papa Redcloud)
1-5-04 Matrix Reloaded Dance Scenes: I forgot to update today and I only realized this morning. So here are some pictures of people in the Matrix Reloaded that look like they're dancing. I didn't use Photoshop at all except to crop and save the pictures! (Chefelf)
12-31-03 Videotape Living Will: Lefty's premiere flash film involves funny, funny coma humor. (Lefty)
12-30-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 8: Undercover as a salesman, George discovers an alarming clue! (Papa Redcloud)
12-29-03 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 5): A myth of the past that haunts the present. (Chefelf)
12-19-03 A Nancy Drew Christmas: A seasonal short story featuring Nancy Drew and chums. (Papa Redcloud)
12-18-03 Questions for Anne Rice: A book review and public service announcement in one! (J.M. Hoffman)
12-17-03 Hell Is Being Trapped in a Room With Your Friends: A Dramatist's Interpretation: Laura imagines a future that may be all too real. (Laura)
12-16-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 7: Undercover as a waitress, Nancy investigates the sinister roadside inn. (Papa Redcloud)
12-15-03 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 4): Prince Green's nymph-elf escort leads him and his men to the edges of the kingdom of Sta'k'l'kkiia! (Chefelf)
12-12-03 Meet the Staff: Slade: Slade tackles the tough nineteen questions. (Slade)
12-10-03 Overrated: The Use of Classical Music in Film Scores: To the delight of the high-brow and highfalutin at heart, Papa Redcloud returns for the second day in a row with a look into the history of film music. (Papa Redcloud)
12-9-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 6: Nancy formulates a daring plan while Carson considers the dangers of allowing his daughter to continue her detective work. (Papa Redcloud)
12-8-03 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 3): Prince Brown battles on in the epic continuation of Chefelf forgetting, for the third consecutive week, to write a real article Castles, The Princes That Fought! (Chefelf)
12-5-03 My Fool is a Crock: My fool is a crock - So apparently there really are consequences if you don't write a My Fool is a Crock story. I finished this one as soon as the bleeding stopped. (J.M. Hoffman)
12-4-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 5: Bess searches for Joni; George prepares to perform in a play. (Papa Redcloud)
12-3-03 An Evening with Laura: Were you once Laura's friend, and now you miss her? Do you not know Laura in person, but wish you did? This handy simulation of the experience of being Laura's college pal is guaranteed to cure you of these ailments. (Laura)
12-1-03 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 2): Once again Chefelf is low on inspiration so you must read another chapter of his latest work, Castles, The Princes That Fought. (Chefelf)
11-28-03 Meet the Staff: J.M. Hoffman: J.M. Hoffman tackles the tough questions. (J.M. Hoffman)
11-27-03 Happy Thanksgiving!: Jen's hand wishes you a happy Thanksgiving. (Jen)
11-26-03 Lance and Eskimo Do the Dishes: An exciting insight into the independent thought processes of Lance Redcloud. (Laura and Laura and Paul)
11-25-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 4: Nancy, Bess and George investigate Clare's situation; Nancy explains her eyeglasses. (Papa Redcloud)
11-24-03 Castles, The Princes That Fought (Chapter 1): I forgot that I had to put an update up today so I wrote this really quickly this morning. I'm sorry. For everything. (Chefelf)
11-21-03 Anthony's Pizza of World Domination: Wherein I discover a conspiracy involving a Bin Laden deputy, bumper stickers and pepperoni. (J.M. Hoffman)
11-20-03 The Anonymous Blonde's Sex Dreams Revealed! and analyzed.: They're not really sex dreams. But they're mostly about celebrities! (Anonymous Blonde)
11-19-03 Lance and Eskimo are Denied Service: Another installment in the "Lance and Eskimo At Food Stores" collection. (Laura)
11-18-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 3: Nancy visits Carson's unfortunate client; Nancy and Ned banter. (Papa Redcloud)
11-17-03 Boohbahs on Parade: An expose on Boohbahs. You know, Boohbas. (Zach)
11-14-03 Yahtzee's Australia Journal (Chapter 1): Yahtzee's Australian journal begins as Yahtzee sets off for the land down under. (Yahtzee)
11-13-03 Jen's Answers to the Jenny Marx Survey: Jen tackles the tough questions in the now classic survey. (Jen)
11-12-03 Lance and Eskimo Think About Spiders: A comic that involves an "either-or" game, and the supermarket. (Laura)
11-11-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 2: In the second installment of Papa Redcloud's Nancy Drew introduces her chums to Carson's shocking new case! (Papa Redcloud)
11-10-03 How To Become a Redcloud Brother: A Q & A that raises more Q's than it does answer A's. (J.M. Hoffman)
11-7-03 Yahtzee's Answers to the Jenny Marx Survey: Yahtzee handed these off to the L&E staff right before he headed out for the land down under. (Yahtzee)
11-5-03 Top Secret Info About the New Sequels to the Matrix!!: Our resident rag doll, given life long ago by Laura for the Wuzup God Project, passes along some insider information he sweet-talked out of one of the Wachowskis' dolls. (Rags)
11-4-03 The Mystery of the High Road Inn: Chapter 1: In the first chapter of Papa Redcloud's epic Nancy Drew fan fiction novel, the girl sleuth's chums Bess and George run out of gas at a strange inn! (Papa Redcloud)
11-3-03 Nate's Answers to the Jenny Marx Survey: Nate tackles the questions on the minds of all the world's communists. (Chefelf)
10-31-03 I'm Off: Don't miss Yahtzee's Last Ever Article! ...until he gets to Australia and sorts his e-mail out, that is. (Yahtzee)
10-30-03 The Anonymous Blonde's Answers to Jenny Marx's Survey: What does this Jenny Marx want from us, anyway? (The Anonymous Blonde)
10-29-03 Laura's Answers to the Jenny Marx Survey: Find out all kinds of things about Laura, primarily, "ways she answers survey questions when she's sleepy." (Laura)
10-28-03 Paul's Answers to Jenny Marx's Questions: Paul's continuation of an email forward started by Karl Marx's daughter. (Paul)
10-27-03 The Candidate: A movie about things that happen to a candidate. (J.M. Hoffman)
10-24-03 'The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen' Was Not A Very Good Film: But it was a damn fine comic book! (Yahtzee)
10-23-03 The Light in the Attic : Behold an actual communication from Jen to her previous (not current, thankfully) landlady. Jen only wishes she had written it in jest ... (Jen)
10-22-03 Self-Effacing Responses to Snotty Survey Answers: Laura engages in some serious ass-covering by means of self-deprecation. That wacky girl! (Laura)
10-20-03 Chefelf's Personal Ad: I decided to place a personal ad to see what kind of response I'd get. So far the phone has remained silent. Because that's how personal ads work. (Chefelf)
10-17-03 The Flowchart Of Life: Probably the last flowchart I will ever make, appropriately enough. (Yahtzee)
10-16-03 The Anonymous Blonde's Half-Completed Photo Album: Look! It's a photo album half-full of pictures of the Anonymous Blonde's wacky life! Don't worry, there's more to come! (Anonymous Blonde)
10-15-03 Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's Vision: Finally, television has produced a show that the legendary author could take pride in. (Laura)
10-13-03 Old School Gaming Quiz (Part 2): You think you're so smart about your video games don't you? Part 1 was nothing more than a warmup! This is the real deal! (Slade)
10-10-03 The Spy Who Loved Me: Because Roger Moore is a smug git whose face looks like it is melting. (Yahtzee)
10-9-03 The People on the Bus Go Round and Round: The first in a continuing series examining the archetypes--evil ones!--who ride the bus with me. (Jen)
10-8-03 Canada, Schmanada: You're an innocent lass about to brave the wilds of Canada to rescue Paul and Laura Redcloud. Will you survive, or will you be eaten by grizzly bears or imprisoned by Captain Nemo, or will something even more Canadian happen? A "choose your own adventure" adventure! (Paul)
10-7-03 lores: In vague homage to one of her favorite webcomics, Henri Ennui and Me, Laura offers a collection of lo-resolution comics. (Laura)
10-6-03 A Smiley Story: A touching tale of good, evil and revenge as told with the new Instant Messenger smilies. (Chefelf)
10-3-03 Why It Would Kick Arse To Be A Character In The Film 'Logan's Run': Fish, and sea greens, and plankton, and protein from the sea. (Yahtzee)
10-2-03 A Postcard for You!: The Anonymous Blonde is on vacation in California. But she was nice enough to send us all a postcard. What a wonderful time she must be having! It's so nice of her to think of us. (Anonymous Blonde)
10-1-03 Cyberchase: A Review: Tasha watches PBS math cartoons so we don't have to. (Tasha Silver)
9-30-03 Uncle Pip in Wintertime: A story that's been passed down through generations of Redclouds, as long as there have been Redclouds. And that's a long time. Our line is of kings! Pepin the Short was a Redcloud! (Papa Redcloud)
9-29-03 The Day I Watched Game Show Network: The face of true evil reveals itself. (Amber-Nicole)
9-26-03 The "What 'What X Are You Test' Are You?" Test: Yahtzee still doesn't know dick about HTML. (Yahtzee)
9-25-03 What's Your Major?: University students, don't waste another day! Find out NOW what your major is! (Jen)
9-24-03 An Assignment for English 111: The assignment: "Connect these six objects in a non-narrative document." Laura made a quiz. (Laura)
9-23-03 Star Wars Episode III Betting Book: There's no prize for this contest, because you can't put a price tag on human suffering. (Paul)
9-22-03 Are You a Zygote?: Are you sure? You'd better take this quiz and find out for certain. (Chefelf)
9-19-03 Why Australia Is Better Than Britain: Yes indeedy. (Yahtzee)
9-18-03 A Girl's Guide to Buying a Rat: The Anonymous Blonde's ex-husband convinced her to write this how-to feature on rat-buying for a glossy women's magazine. After all that research, she'll never buy the wrong rat again! (Anonymous Blonde)
9-17-03 How Much Does Your Boyfriend Suck? I Mean Really! You Know What I Mean, Ladies. Huh? Huhhhh?: Former Girl Zone advice columnist Ariana Squirrel resurfaces showing her bitter stripes with a quiz that scientifically measures the suckiness of your current gentlemanlove. (Ariana Squirrel)
9-15-03 Smells Like Freedom: Because Americans just don't display enough needlessly patriotic things these days. (Jen & Nate)
9-12-03 Drink This: You'd be surprised what it's possible to come up with when you've got a deadline for an article and it's very late in the day. (Yahtzee)
9-11-03 Waiting in a Parking Lot: A Screenplay. (J.M. Hoffman)
9-10-03 Laura's New Favorite Book: Laura found the best book, in a universe where the mark of quality in a novel is the inclusion as a minor character of a famous real-life golden age Hollywood director. (Laura)
9-9-03 Pismo Tenderloins 2: Our favorite superhero returns to clean up the city. You should clean your city once every two months whether it needs it or not. (Paul and Laura)
9-8-03 My New Xbox: I've spent a lot of time modding my Xbox but I wasn't completely satisfied with any of the skins offered by my new operating system. (Chefelf)
9-5-03 How To Be British: My first ever 'request' article. (Yahtzee)
9-4-03 Which Wife of Henry VIII Are YOU?: The second in a series of tests revealing the member of a set of ladies who are of no interest to anyone but some serious nerds to whom you bear more than the most passing resemblance. (Come on, you can parse that!) (Anonymous Blonde)
9-3-03 My Fool is a Crock: Rory, of Rory fame, sets his long-awaited pen of Roritude to the holy parchment of "My Fool is a Crock" stories. (Rory)
9-2-03 Asking for a Raise: ... Or more accurately, how not to. (J.M. Hoffman)
9-1-03 Old School Gaming Quiz (Part 1): A simple quiz to test your knowledge of the video games of yesteryear. Well, to test your knowledge of Slade's opinions on the games of yesteryear. (Slade)
8-25-03 Unofficial Week Off: Everyone has been eaten by spiders. Come back next week. ()
8-22-03 Freddy Vs. Jason: It's about two unkillable blokes trying to kill each other! We could be here a while! (Yahtzee)
8-21-03 The Dullest Little Whorehouse in Texas: The enigmatic first chapter of the world's least-exciting detective agency. Fill in your own action! (Jen)
8-20-03 Lance Turns 21 - Part 2: The exciting continuation, of varying font size and lustre. (Laura)
8-19-03 Self-Indulgent Writer's Workshop: This year's SIWW is guaranteed to make you feel smugger about all your rejection letters. (Paul)
8-18-03 Key Food: The "key" is apparently being the worst at what you do. (Chefelf)
8-15-03 Some Leaflet The Physiotherapist Gave Me: If you can hear your spine cracking in two like a dry twig, that means it's working. (Yahtzee)
8-14-03 My Fool is a Crock: Zach guessed that we were just lying on the floor in a state of mental angst, hoping and praying that some guy we didn't know named Zach would write up a crappy My Fool is a Crock story and email it to us. Zach guessed right! (Zach)
8-13-03 Lance Turns 21- Part 1: Laura experiments in imaginary stories, multi-part comics, and typed talk bubbles. Fun fun fun! (Laura)
8-12-03 My Fool is a Crock: They're still trickling in. Jake takes a stab at the world's most popular literary style. (Jake)
8-11-03 Top 10 Funniest Things People Yell at Me When I'm Riding My Bike: When I ride my bike through the streets of Norther Rhode Island and Southern Massachusetts, many people feel it is their comedic obligation to yell clever things out of their car windows at me. I decided to compile a list of the funniest things people have yelled at me so far. (Chefelf)
8-8-03 Ask Yahtzee 3: Yahtzee continues to alleviate the nagging questions of the great viewing public. (Yahtzee)
8-7-03 A Story About Babies: The Anonymous Blonde was supposed to play poker with her friend, the Ignominious Redhead. The trouble was, the IR's new baby, Oisin Vertumnus, was making a lot of racket. The AB told him a tale in dulcet tones and he went to sleep. That tale is reprinted herein. (Anonymous Blonde)
8-6-03 Bears! Musical Arrangement: Lefty, creator of L&E sister site Polymorph, sings selected tunes from Bears!, Laura's critically disdained yet strangely life-affirming musical about bears, and Joey Lawrence. (mp3, 1412k) (Lefty)
8-5-03 The Laudry Demons: A photographic tour of Paul's soul, by way of his dirty linen. (Flash, 70k) (Paul)
8-4-03 Heccubus' Guide To Guessing Your Way Through College: A five step guide to being all that you can be, with half the effort. (Heccubus)
8-1-03 Bruce Campbell's Get Well Soon Card: Because it's nice to know there's someone there for you when you've received trivial wounds. (Yahtzee)
7-31-03 "U"'re Gonna Love It!: Toast, that is. Or possibly alleged college student design asthetic. (Jen)
7-30-03 Advice for TV Episode Summary Copy Writers: Um... yup. (Laura)
7-29-03 Problems I Have with the Big Bang Theory: Srmoore, believing the Big Bang Theory is too far-fetched, proffers a slightly more believable theory involving advanced galactic civilizations and Charlize Theron. (srmoore)
7-28-03 In the Kitchen: An attempt to make macaroni and cheese becomes cause for sorrow and heartache. (Jake)
7-25-03 Of Shampoo Adverts And Nintendo: Come one, come all, to point and laugh at dodgy 80's merchandising. (Yahtzee)
7-24-03 Caolan's Birthday Movie: Paul's favorite girlfriend delivers a largely nonsensical, occasionally mean-spirited, consistently sloppy Flash tidbit that was originally used (in part) as a party invitation, and which appears exactly one week and one day before it will be relevant. Bon appetit! (PS: Did you know that Paul and his girlfriend have the same birthday?) (Caolan)
7-23-03 Lance and Eskimo Babysit: The pair spends an evening with the charming daughter of the rich actress upstairs. (Laura)
7-22-03 Geeko!: If you haven't seen "The Screen Savers" on TechTV and you find this entertaining, well, then more power to you. (Paul)
7-21-03 Pismo Tenderloins: The first in what we can only hope will be a series of one stories about a corporate crime-fighting superhero. (Paul)
7-18-03 The Curse Of The Don't Mention Panties Game: Probably the worst thing I have ever written. (Yahtzee)
7-17-03 Absurd is Right: Absurdist fiction that puts the "ridiculous" in "absurd." (Jen)
7-16-03 My Stupid Fly Adventure: Laura is continually startled by an insect. It's really quite sad. (Laura)
7-15-03 Jake's Future (This Week, part 1): Everyone needs inflated dreams that can never be realized. Why not throw in orgies while you're at it? (Jake)
7-14-03 Additional Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode II (pt. 2): Yet more reasons to be filled with bitterness and hatred. (Chefelf)
7-11-03 Articulate Jim: A Search for Something: The whole shebang! Produced here with kind thanks to my sense of disillusionment! (Yahtzee)
7-10-03 Overrated: The Declaration of Independence: When in the course of human snore... (Papa Redcloud)
7-9-03 Websites that are Anagrams of Lance and Eskimo: There's more than you'd think. (Paul)
7-8-03 Lance and Eskimo and the Style Bullies: Our heroes run into a perilous duo in their building lobby. (Laura)
7-7-03 The Reign of the iloo: A grim prediction of what the future holds. (J.M. Hoffman)
7-4-03 Ask Yahtzee 2: Tell your parents it's educational. Hey, I just noticed it's the fourth of July. Hooray! (Yahtzee)
7-3-03 Can You Take Me to the Prom?: The Anonymous Blonde doesn't have any proms to go to right now, but if something comes up, she'll sure be happy to have this handy screening method for prospective dates! (Anonymous Blonde)
7-2-03 Boots: Mama Redcloud sounds off on the difficulty of purchasing appropriate footwear on the Internet. (Mama Redcloud)
7-1-03 My Fool is a Crock: A story that will make you throw back your head and howl skyward, "LITERALLY!!!" (Mr. Fabulous)
6-30-03 Crappy Things Found on Rhode Island Websites (pt. 1): The state of Rhode Island may like to think that it is hip and cutting edge but the sad fact of the matter is that it has some of the worst websites on the entire internet. Here I highlight a few of the crappy things I've found while digging through some of those sites. (Chefelf)
6-27-03 Ultra Scary Suddeny Frighty Ghosty Thing!: A parody. Or is that just what I want you to think? (Flash, 300k) (Yahtzee)
6-26-03 Jake: An Introduction: A recent entry from a reader of the site who dislikes human contact so much that he's practically a Redcloud brother already! (Jake)
6-25-03 Lance and Eskimo Visit the Rich Actress Upstairs: In which our heroes go a-calling. (Laura and Laura and Paul)
6-24-03 Posto!: The name of this post-apocalyptic Bingo game is not meant to imply that the author liked "The Postman", though the part with Tom Petty was pretty cool. (Chris)
6-23-03 I Was a Teenage Wizard: Toys "R" Us kid or no, Jen does not want Harry Potter to grow up. (Jen)
6-20-03 Friday the 13th parts 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 and 8: Did you have a busy weekend? Yahtzee had a busy weekend. (Yahtzee)
6-19-03 Additional Reasons to Hate Star Wars: Episode II (pt. 1): Hundreds of people have emailed me to tell me that there are additional reasons to hate Episode II. In order to keep this list comprehensive I have decided to begin listing their reasons. (Chefelf)
6-18-03 Lance and Eskimo Kick Ass and Take Names: Isn't multi-tasking fun? (Laura)
6-17-03 My Fool is a Crock: You can't spell "crock" without F-U-N, because "crock" is spelled "froccunk". (Annajones)
6-16-03 MSN's iloo: Festivalgoers in Britain this summer will be able to try out Microsoft's internet-enabled portable toilet. (Originally appeared in "The Bacon" Volume 1, Issue 2.) (Chefelf)
6-13-03 Ask Yahtzee: High on life, Yahtzee takes it upon himself to educate the world. (Yahtzee)
6-12-03 The American Crème: Pixy takes an in depth look at the past present and future of Oreo cookies. (Pixy)
6-11-03 Overrated: Hamlet (Part 2): "Shuffle off this mortal coil"? Honestly. It sounds like what you do between the Mashed Potato and the Twist. (Papa Redcloud)
6-10-03 Overrated: Hamlet (Part 1): Has anyone ever read it for fun? (Papa Redcloud)
6-9-03 Karma Chameleon: It's more than just a lousy song from the 80's. It's the new symbol of global telecommunications. (Chefelf)
6-6-03 Rorschach Vs. The Retard Raider: Yahtzee made a comic! Using an idea that isn't his and a character that also isn't his! (Yahtzee)
6-5-03 My Fool is a Crock: Apparently everyone's fool is a crock. (The Anonymous Blonde)
6-4-03 The Laura Trivia Quiz: Inspired by occasional emails offering a chance to be quizzed on her friends from the Quiz Your Friends network and others like it, Laura created a quiz for her friends: You. (Laura)
6-3-03 Accredited US Universities with Silly Names: Thinking of going to college, but not sure which .edu will look funniest in an email address? Paul's guide will help you decide. (Paul)
6-2-03 Extinct Beverage: Fusion Water: It's water with fusion in it. We call it "Fusion Water." (Chefelf)
5-30-03 My Fool is a Crock: Never let it be said that Yahtzee doesn't jump on bandwagons at every opportunity. He is to bandwagons what the Super Mario Brothers were to anthropomorphic mushrooms. (Yahtzee)
5-28-03 Lance and Eskimo Go Home: Another one-pager in which Lance and Eskimo head down memory lane. (Laura)
5-27-03 Paul's Online Personal: He's dating someone, but, you know, it never hurts to have insurance. (Paul)
5-26-03 My Fool is a Crock: Jen takes a stab at the newfound "Fool is a Crock" genre. (Jen)
5-23-03 100 Better Questions: A follow-up, of sorts. (Yahtzee)
5-22-03 My Fool is a Crock: Well over a year ago the Brothers Redcloud made vague plans to have a "My Fool is a Crock" theme week where they all wrote a story about the world's worst Jester. Paul and Laura snuck their stories up without alerting Nate. Nate chose today to finally release his long anticipated tale. (Chefelf)
5-21-03 The Boy Meets World Inconsistently Detailed Episode Guide for Season 5: Laura finally goes off the deep end with her fanatical yet oddly arbitrary love of the 1993-99 ABC teen sit-com Boy Meets World. (Laura)
5-20-03 People on the Bus I Hate: Nothing like a ride on public transportation to fill your soul with rancor. (Paul)
5-19-03 Chefelf Needs a New Computer: But he can't do it alone. He needs wonderful readers like you to give him money. Click below to make a Paypal donation!
(Chefelf)
5-16-03 Jason X: Yahtzee finally gets around to watching a film he must have missed while it was in cinemas. (Yahtzee)
5-15-03 Anonymousblonde.com!!!: The Anonymous Blonde woke up one morning to find her room in disorder, blood on her lips and fingers, a crescent moon tattooed in woad upon her brow, dog droppings in her slippers, and this on her desktop. (The Anonymous Blonde?)
5-14-03 Lance and Eskimo Beat Feet: In a brand new Lance and Eskimo one-pager, our heroes make a run for it. (Laura)
5-13-03 Consumer Alert: Voice Recognition Software: Bless its little heart, it tries. (Sister Wendy)
5-12-03 Pictures of Texas State Officials: An in depth look at pictures of the healthy and happy Republicans that run the great state of Texas. Don't mess with them. (Chefelf)
5-9-03 More Of The 100 Questions: I've started, so I'll finish. (Yahtzee)
5-8-03 Which Suicidal Poetess Are You?: Well, didn't you always want to know? (Anonymous Blonde)
5-7-03 Thoughts on the Role of The Lizzie McGuire Movie As It Regards to the Story Arc of the Series as a Whole: You didn't think she wouldn't go to see this, did you? And if you did, surely you didn't think she'd see this and then not write about it. Methinks all the staunch defense of her negative review made her like the show all the more, because she is contrary. (Laura)
5-6-03 The American Presidents 2: The contemplative sides of comic book heroes The American Presidents. (Paul)
5-5-03 Chris Inventions: Long-time friend of Lance & Eskimo, Chris, comes up with games, ideas and inventions all the time. They are always terrible. This is a review of some of the more memorable ideas he's had. (Chefelf)
5-2-03 The 100 Questions: This is probably the best way to get to know me. (Yahtzee)
5-1-03 Lance and Eskimo in a Magazine: Laura created this comic for the school humor magazine she founded. (Laura)
4-30-03 Quest for the Crown: Official Strategy Guide: Questwood Studios' QUEST FOR THE CROWN Official Strategy Guide features complete coverage of the latest game from the company that brought you THE SEARCH FOR MIGHTY-BREATH THE MAGIC PEGASUS. Players will find comprehensive walkthroughs for, as well as winning strategies for how to beat the game. In addition, area maps, detailed item lists and an all-inclusive character library are also provided. The best way to win is here! Warning: Spoilers Inside! (Nate & Paul)
4-29-03 Quest for the Crown: Paul and Nate have developed a hot new online RPG, and you'll get to be the first to play! (Paul and Nate)
4-28-03 Extinct Beverage: Amp: It's like Mountain Dew with ENERGY instead of caffeine! (Chefelf)
4-25-03 Amazing Spider-Man, The Game: It's not a C64 rom, and it isn't based on a horror film, but hey, there's no need to be pedantic. (Yahtzee)
4-24-03 The Anonymous Blonde's First Erotic Science Fiction: Some terrible publishing house wants to make the Anonymous Blonde write an erotic sci-fi serial for them. She's doing it, because she needs the money. But that doesn't mean she's going to do a good job. (Anonymous Blonde)
4-23-03 How they Localize Commercials: Paul continues his study of advertising by presenting four different regional versions of the same commercial. (Paul)
4-22-03 Laura's Unfortunate Powerpoint Situation: This article--which contains a Powerpoint thing--would probably be better if it weren't following in the great footsteps of Paul's Skeletor thing. And if you had Powerpoint on your computer. (Laura)
4-21-03 Computer Keyboards: A breeding ground for unnecessary features. (Chefelf)
4-18-03 Two Hundred Seconds: The problems with organised religion and mistranslation. (Yahtzee)
4-17-03 Adventures in Interviewing: In which Jen, as Elizabeth Shue, has wacky high rise adventures. (Jen)
4-16-03 What a Girl Wants: This movie review could be the sequel to Laura's review of What Women Want, especially since she went to see this film in much the same circumstances. (Laura)
4-15-03 Elephants On Parade: The Anonymous Blonde will render anything unto Caesar that Caesar wants, because Caesar didn't get to look at some damn fine elephants. (Anonymous Blonde)
4-14-03 Please "Flush". Thank's.: An ongoing battle over the state of New England signage practices. (Chefelf)
4-11-03 The Adventures Of Angular Mike: I made a special page for my latest creation! So far, thirteen comic strips that make very little sense! (Yahtzee)
4-10-03 Reductio Ad: Let's Have Even More War on Television: How we can mine more entertainment out of human suffering. (Papa Redcloud)
4-9-03 Trolleys Suck: A senioritis-stricken Laura doesn't appreciate the multiple modes of transportation that Rhode Island has to offer. (Laura)
4-8-03 Dress Up Paul: An actual, working dress-up doll of Paul! Now you can live out your fantasies of making him look slightly stupider than usual. Complete with Paul's actual wardrobe, including the Megadeth shirt with Vic Rattlehead and all the purple goo. (Paul)
4-7-03 No Bone Movies: A bit of nostalgia about the early years of Ozzy Osbourne's solo career. (Chefelf)
4-4-03 Meet The Crazy Moon Man: Yahtzee makes the staggering discovery that you shouldn't believe everything you read on the Internet. (Yahtzee)
4-3-03 I Bought a Website: Jen worries about the social ramifications of web-site ownship. (Jen)
4-2-03 Eskimo's Date: Finally! Lance and Eskimo, remember them? A one-page comic about Eskimo on a date. (Laura)
4-1-03 Great Powerpoint Demonstrations by Villains, Part 1: Skeletor's Soliloquy: Back in the day, villains had to freestyle their gloats, or use cumbersome cue cards. But if Skeletor had access to Microsoft Office, we all know He-Man would be sitting through a lengthy PowerPoint presentation like this one.
(150KB, in powerpoint format) (Paul)
3-31-03 Where's the Protocol? (part 1) - How to Get a Coffee: The proper way to get a coffee. A survival guide for when I'm the King of the World and you want to keep your sorry ass out of prison. (Chefelf)
3-28-03 Person Without Girlfriend: Be nice to Yahtzee. He's not very happy right now. (Yahtzee)
3-27-03 The Anonymous Blonde's Ancestress' Oregon Trail Journal!: Blood tells, sort of. (Anonymous Blonde's Ancestress)
3-26-03 Internet Tips for Kids: Laura provides an invaluable service for all the children and family-oriented consumers out there. (Laura)
3-25-03 Aliens Have Eaten My Brain: Questions supplied by daytime TV, March 19, 2003, between 12:51 and 1:05 p.m. to which the answer is "yes". (Jen)
3-24-03 Extinct Beverage: 180 Energy Drink: Yet another magic energy elixir. (Chefelf)
3-21-03 Snormula 1: Yahtzee is enthusiastic about motor racing. Enthusiastic in his hatred, that is! Ho ho! (Yahtzee)
3-20-03 Bush to Saddam: We will--hey, get that camera out of my face!: Paul zooms in on what annoys him most about Iraq media coverage. (Paul)
3-19-03 I'm Sick of All Those Love Songs: I swear, Laura just hasn't been the same since she became a misogynist hermit. (Laura)
3-18-03 Overrated: War: War! What is it good for? Being overrated, apparently. (Papa Redcloud)
3-17-03 The Lovely Ladies of TechTV: A very long article about how much I would love to date all of the girls on TechTV. Written before I even met my girlfriend, I swear! (Chefelf)
3-14-03 The Premeditated Murder Flowchart: This website accepts no responsibility for people who are murdered directly or indirectly because of this feature. (Yahtzee)
3-13-03 The Anonymous Blonde's Printable Activity Fun Pages: Continuing her tradition of continuing the tradition of 50-year-old people putting stuff on the internet that doesn't belong there, the Anonymous Blonde brings you hot, printable pictures of her own luscious wardrobe--plus a luscious, limited-edition AB paper doll! (Anonymous Blonde)
3-12-03 Interesting Things About Amber: Direct from Laura's geology notebook to your stomach. (Laura)
3-11-03 A New L&E Promo: We're launching a new, slick ad campaign. It's got gears in! (Paul)
3-10-03 Patriotic Bumper Stickers: Don't get caught with your pants down when the inevitable American/British lead invasion of Iraq begins. Show your support for the war with these new patriotic bumper stickers! (Chefelf)
3-7-03 Age of Evil: I'm making a total conversion for Duke Nukem 3D. I just can't stop making games. This may be something to do with my astrological chart. (Yahtzee)
3-6-03 The Fifteen Dollar Haircut: Further exercises in horror, in the style of Paul Redcloud, master of horrality. (Jen)
3-5-03 A Day in the Life of Laura: Nick's partly retaliatory article chronicles Laura's average day. (Nick)
3-4-03 The Gang Scene in Detroit- An Insider's View: Reader and Motor City resident Mr. Fabulous expounds on some of the lesser-known gangs of Detroit. (Mr. Fabulous)
3-3-03 Name That Beauty Salon! (Part 2): Once again you must determine whether I made up the lousy salon name or if it is real. Godspeed, my dear friend. (Chefelf)
2-28-03 Why It Would Kick Arse To Be A Piece Of Chewing Gum That Has Been Chewed A Little Bit But Not Too Much: One of Yahtzee's less riveting treatises. (Yahtzee)
2-27-03 Parlor Games for the Next Millennium: Have you ever really wanted to act out a play over IM, but you just didn't have an internet-friendly script to use? Once again, the Anonymous Blonde pulls you out of your rut of stupidity by the forelock and gives you the solution. (Anonymous Blonde)
2-26-03 Laura Reviews: State of Grace: Laura gets back on the horse of critical reviewship of innocent children's shows. When will she ever learn? (laura)
2-24-03 Extinct Beverage: Jeff's Berry Dream Soda: New York Egg Cream Soda! It's even worse than it sounds! Yes, that's possible. (Chefelf)
2-21-03 Richard and Maureen's Amazing Time Travel Adventure: The second best short story about a dinner party on this website! (Yahtzee)
2-20-03 Bored of the Dance: Yahtzee is not bored of the dance. He loves the dance, the hypocrite. Shame, Yahtzee! Shaaame! (Yahtzee)
2-19-03 Nick's Day: Feeling out of the loop since Nick went to California, Laura speculates about the happenings of an average day in his life. (Laura)
2-18-03 Don't Joke About Earthquakes: An important public service announcement. (mp3, 400k) (Paul)
2-17-03 The Locust (pt. 2): The second volume of my 1985 comic book. (Chefelf)
2-14-03 A Very Special Valentines Day Cowboy Comic!: Something for all you ladies out there on this special day. Yahtzee is the funny man. Laugh at the funny man. (Yahtzee)
2-13-03 Fix The Mix: Holla! Pixy takes on P.Diddy's neverending fascination with the remix.
Let's go! Uh huh, yeah. (Pixy)
2-12-03 Lance's Book Report: In lieu of an article this week, Laura has transcribed something she found on Lance and Eskimo's apartment floor. At this rate, her next article will be a common pickle.
(Because that was also on their floor.) (Lance)
2-11-03 The Fabulous City: Paul experiments with horrible web design. Really horrible web design. Really, really horrible web design. (Paul)
2-10-03 Love: Man's Greatest Fear: A warm up for Valentine's Day. It's half article, half mindless rant, half sure to embarrass Jen and all article that is sure to embarrass me. It goes on and on and doesn't really make any point! You'll love it! (Chefelf)
2-7-03 The Return Of The Don't Mention Panties Game: Bear with me, I'm hoping to work a trilogy out of this. (Yahtzee)
2-6-03 Here There Be Dragons: Field notes from kindergarten. (Jen)
2-5-03 The Laura University History Department: The mission of Laura University is to provide only classes that Laura would want to take. (Laura)
2-4-03 The American Presidents: The first in a series of comics chronicling the adventures of the American Presidents, John Peacock President and U. S. War Bug. (Paul)
2-3-03 Cops!: A Splash! picture depicting the wild night life of Toon Town. (Chefelf)
1-31-03 Why I Should Be Cutest Redcloud Brother: I never let little things like being a year late get in the way of my dreams. (Yahtzee)
1-30-03 Annals of Interior Decorating: The Perfect Dorm Room: On Tuesday, Caolan received a panicked telephone call from her boyfriend, begging her to write an update for Tuesday, since he was marooned in his new apartment without Internet access. Being a good kid, she obliged, but then for some reason he had an article anyway. Remaining good, the poor little mome filled in for the perennially shiftless Jen & the Anonymous Blonde instead. (Caolan)
1-29-03 The Weather: Laura is sick of arguing controversial topics like religion and politics and television. (Laura)
1-28-03 More Like the Penultimate Resort!: Paul and Laura have a new idea for a TV show. Paul and Laura are idiots. Draw your own conclusions. (Paul and Laura)
1-27-03 Name That Beauty Salon!: Do you have what it takes to determine which lousy beauty salon name is real and which lousy beauty salon name I made up? (Chefelf)
1-24-03 Star Trek: Nemesis Was Not A Very Good Film: Yahtzee honestly didn't know about Jen's article yesterday. (Yahtzee)
1-23-03 Take the Con, Ensign B-list Celebrity: Star Trek Guest Star: not the deadend career you thought. (Jen)
1-22-03 Laura's First PHP Program: Last week Laura brought you a PHP program that she conceptualized and Paul actually designed. This week, she brings you a program SHE ACTUALLY WROTE--hence, it is not only intrinsically idiotic, but the content was given far less attention than the programming elements. Unfortunately, she had nothing else to put up this week, so enjoy! (Laura)
1-21-03 The Peace Coat: A fashion revue of sorts. (Paul)
1-20-03 Extinct Beverage: Niagara: The drink that quenches your thirst and makes you hot in the pants at the same time! (Chefelf)
1-17-03 Where Are You Going When You Die?: It's probably best to make sure. (Yahtzee)
1-15-03 The Rabid Pro-Lizzie McGuire Hate Mail Creator: Now you no longer have to spend time typing out your own angry responses to Laura's Lizzie McGuire review, which is good news for 90% of her readers. (Laura)
1-14-03 The Tale of Blessed Bernard: An Oregon Trail journal with all the elements of a potboiler thriller: adventure, romance, a bolus, and an evil baby. Illustrated by Lefty. (Omar Gookin)
1-13-03 The Locust (pt. 1): A comic book that Chefelf drew in 1986. (Chefelf)
1-10-03 Why it would kick arse to be Spider-Man: This article would probably have been more relevant if I could have been arsed to write it around the time of the video release. (Yahtzee)
1-9-03 What Does 2003 Hold for You?: The Anonymous Blonde lets go of her resolutions -- and her illusions -- just so she can bring you a little New Year's clairvoyance. (Anonymous Blonde)
1-8-03 The Trouble with LAN Parties: Laura complains about gender bias in multi-user gaming. (Laura)
1-7-03 Bad Ads 3: There's so much commercialism in commercials these days! It's almost enough to disillusion one with the ad industry altogether. (Paul)
1-6-03 Hate Email 1: Possibly the greatest advantage to having your own website is that you get to receive hate mail from people who disagree with you. Actually, that may be the ONLY advantage. (Chefelf)
1-3-03 The Christmas Flowchart: This is exactly how my Christmas went. (Yahtzee)
1-2-03 Modern Day Lepers: Unclean! Unclean! Would you like to fill out a survey? (Jen)
1-1-03 Laura vs Essays for Harvard: Battle of the Century: Laura, topical as a new tube of skin ointment (as is her way), honors today's red-letter date, that is, the application deadline for Harvard. (Laura)
12-31-02 Paul's Driving Manual: Everything you'll need to get your driver's license in This Glorious City. (Paul)
12-30-02 Where Have You Gone, Joe Shortsleeve?: Contemplative reflection on the state of the world and Boston's favorite garment-named newsman. (Pixy)
12-17-02 The Azores Mystery: A taut thriller with a twist ending loosely based on true events. (Paul)
12-16-02 Winter Wonderland: Revealed: An L&E investigation into the lyrics of a popular holiday song reveals a sick and sordid tale of love, murder and drug addiction. (Chefelf)
12-13-02 The Don't Mention Panties Game: It's like 'Alive', but with panties. Or rather, not with panties. So quite a lot like 'Alive', then. (Yahtzee)
12-12-02 Barbarian Queen II: The Empress Strikes Back! Hey, it's their title, not mine. (Chefelf)
12-11-02 College Crunch: Laura continues to discuss college, and why they should let her in. (Laura)
12-10-02 Paul's L&E Dream Mansion: Some day Paul will have the power to hand this blueprint to an architect and say "Build this", and the architect will have the power to kick Paul in the shins and run away. (Paul)
12-9-02 Jen's Christmas List: Shouldn't this have gone up last week? Perhaps. But the Brothers Redcloud accidentally commissioned two separate authors to do an article so we get this one a little later than expected. Ho ho ho! (Jen)
12-6-02 Yahtzee's Christmas Wishlist: Yahtzee asks for stuff he doesn't really want from people who aren't going to buy them for him. When you think about it, it makes a lot of sense. (Yahtzee)
12-5-02 The Anonymous Blonde's Christmas List: Think of all the fun I've missed! Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed. Next year I could be oh so good if / you'll check off my Christmas list. (The Anonymous Blonde)
12-4-02 Laura's DVD Wish List: Laura continues the impromptu theme week with a love letter to the medium of digital video. (Laura)
12-3-02 Paul's Christmas List: Now Paul wants stuff for Christmas too? Geez, how much stuff are you going to have to buy? (Paul)
12-2-02 My Christmas Wish List: All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth a boat load of cash and a mess of presents! (Chefelf)
11-29-02 Evil Dead: The Game: Yahtzee reviews another game from the highly specialised field of crap C64 roms based on horror movies. (Yahtzee)
11-28-02 Your Love Horoscope for 12/02: This is the kind of love horoscope that asks you personality-test questions and then tells you your personality. So I guess it's a love personality test. (Anonymous Blonde)
11-27-02 Nationally Meritless in America: Laura kicks off "College Crunch" by bitching about the National Merit Scholarship Competition, and Henry provides a delightful essay about why he should win the money. If I were in charge, I'd give it to him. (Henry and Laura)
11-26-02 GEORGE W. BUSH'S SECRET REVEALED!: It is proved definitively that GWB is not some poop. But the truth is even more horrifying! (Paul)
11-25-02 END PROGRAM: A chilling tale of man vs. computers that almost constitutes an update! (Chefelf)
11-22-02 The Spam Man Cometh: The truth behind spam is finally revealed! (Yahtzee)
11-21-02 Bruce Hellmont, Girl Detective: Noir. Very noir. (Laura and Paul and Caolan and Jen)
11-20-02 Laura Reviews Braceface: That new Alicia Silverstone cartoon about kids in middle school. Laura actually likes it, don't worry. (Laura)
11-19-02 Mu and Spick: Space Adventurers: It's a space opera! There are adventures! (Paul)
11-18-02 Gerunds in the Movies: Now YOU can quickly generate the titles of upcoming movies! Astonish your friends by predicting the next box office failure! (Chefelf)
11-15-02 Your Training Is Complete: A little story I wrote while locked in a sensory deprivation tank. (Yahtzee)
11-13-02 Overrated: Ancient Egypt: There are pyramids in South America tons taller than anything in Egypt. (Papa Redcloud)
11-12-02 Tegrisome Returns: Check up on the latest developments at our thriving business affiliate! (Keith Worcester)
11-11-02 The Six Esses of Extinct Beverage Tasting: A quick guide at how to get more out of your extinct and endangered beverage tasting. (Chefelf & Paul)
11-8-02 The Search for Something, chapter 9: Nine down, an indeterminate two-digit figure to go. (Yahtzee)
11-7-02 Halloween Article?: Why didn’t Jacques write a Halloween article last week, on Halloween? (Jacques)
11-6-02 Girl Zone Advice, Volume 2: They say that persistence is the mother of invention. This is why we continue to offer serious-minded advice for young ladies and gentlemen. Because we are trying to make an invention. (Ariana Squirrel)
11-5-02 Which Assassinated US President are You?: Strictly speaking, you are none of them, but you can always pretend. (Paul)
11-4-02 Deathstalker IV: The stunning conclusion to the Deathstalker/Barbarian Queen series. Unfortunately it's a little too late for originality. Lance and Eskimo's five hundredth article! (Chefelf)
11-1-02 Halloween Resurrection: The words 'flogging' and 'dead horse' spring to mind. (Yahtzee)
10-31-02 Violent Entertainment: Why is violence so entertaining? Perhaps it’s because there’s not enough nudity on television. (Jacques)
10-30-02 Once Upon a Time in the House of Gerard Depardieu: Bearly bearable. (Paul and Laura)
10-29-02 Overrated: Citizen Kane: Orson Welles was in the Transformers movie, for God's sakes. (Papa Redcloud)
10-28-02 Extinct Beverage: Fruit Craze: You'd have to be Fruit Crazy to like it! (Chefelf)
10-25-02 Welcome Short Construction Workers!: Another wonderful Splash! picture. (Chefelf)
10-24-02 Emmy Fever! - Part Two: Jacques steals an Emmy!!! (Jacques)
10-23-02 A Tribute to Rory on His Birthday: Laura unleashes her poetic side to help celebrate her chum's coming of age. (Laura)
10-22-02 The Ten Dollar Haircut: Either an exercise in horror from one of the genre's modern masters, or Paul complaining about stuff. (Paul)
10-21-02 Cyanide: Silent Killer: Arguably the worst piece of fiction that anyone has ever written. (Fiction)
10-18-02 Hellraiser 3: Hell on Earth: Another TV celebrity's darkest hour is slated for the archives. (Yahtzee)
10-17-02 Jacques’s Play Hits Broadway!!!: Jacques dons a monocle and prepares for greatness. (Jacques)
10-16-02 The Further Adventures of Johnny Woonsocket's Adventures: The complete chronicles of a waste of a summer afternoon. (Various Q. Authors)
10-15-02 A Dialogue between A and B: Starring A! And B! And introducing C as himself! (Paul)
10-7-02 What is the Purpose of Life?: According to some Christians it is to tease wild bobcats. (Chefelf)
10-4-02 The Search for Something (chapter 8): More novel. Getting sick of this yet? (Yahtzee)
10-3-02 Emmy Fever! - Part One: Jacques wins an Emmy!!! (Jacques)
10-2-02 The Girls' Zone Role Models in Science Quiz: A sadistically difficult quiz about women in science. Yay, education. (Girls' Zone)
10-1-02 Killing a Boy: Are you so sure you know how? Take this quiz and find out. (Anonymous Blonde)
9-30-02 Extinct Beverage: Tizer: From the Tizer bottle we learn the French for "Refresh your Head" but not "This tastes like Band-Aids." (Chefelf)
9-27-02 Fight Or Flight?: An entertaining little diversion in which you can learn how you would have fared during mankind's evolutionary history. (Yahtzee)
9-26-02 The Spectacular Gatsby: The adventures of literature’s greatest Gatsby must continue! (Jacques)
9-25-02 Dr. Hansen's Face Wash Commercial: (Flash, 110k) Thirty seconds of hygienic adver-tainment! (Laura)
9-24-02 Paul's Dream Journal: A clever piece of software helps Paul explore the world of his subconscious. (Paul)
9-23-02 The Epic of Badwater Beaudry: C'mon, it's an epic poem with ASCII art... how can you not love it? (Fiction)
9-20-02 Sins of the Night: Yahtzee continues his study of naked breasts - er, the erotic thriller genre, in a thoroughly intelligent and highbrow fashion. Plus: pictures of kittens! (Yahtzee)
9-19-02 History’s Debacle: Cheryl Tiegs versus Honoré de Balzac. Bear witness to the memorable, yet terrible, clash of titans. (Jacques)
9-18-02 A Dramatic Tale: A wickedly melodramatic tale involving a real bunny. (Laura)
9-17-02 Kat Gets Sent to the Principal's Office: The continuing academic difficulties of the girl that Jacques got suspended. (Kat)
9-16-02 Motion to Strike... COMEDY GOLD!: A day in court proves to be the inspiration for great comic adventures. (Chefelf)
9-13-02 The Search for Something (chapter 7): Another novel chapter. Don't worry, I've got a million of these. (Yahtzee)
9-12-02 Genetic Frenzy: Studying the intricate nature of DNA is just like teaching a dog to bake cookies. You can probably do it if you spend enough time, but it’s just not worth the effort of wiping up all that slobber. It’s easier to handle things the old fashioned way: with phrenology and koalas who can cook. (Jacques)
9-11-02 Overrated: The Mona Lisa: Papa Redcloud explains why the world's most famous painting sucks. (Papa Redcloud)
9-10-02 The Ballad of Slylock Fox: (Flash, 300k) For those of you with inadequate syndicated Sunday comics, Slylock Fox is a sleuth who outwits Paul every week with elegant solutions to clever conundrums. This film is Paul's revenge. (Paul)
9-9-02 Extinct Beverage: Venom: The drink that makes you wish you were drinking actual Venom. (Chefelf)
9-6-02 The Early Morning Flowchart: Find out exactly how bad some mornings get. (Yahtzee)
9-5-02 Embassy Blues - Reprise: And so, the Iraqi embassy takes a bow, and Jacques’s troubles return for an encore. (Jacques)
9-4-02 Ghostwriter Remembered: Laura's shady memory comes through once again to provide vague and incomplete information about the old PBS show Ghostwriter. (Laura)
9-3-02 The Borscht Period: A Hippo Phenomenology: How much do you know about hippos? (Anonymous Blonde)
9-2-02 Not for Nibblers: The makers of Triscuit snack crackers don't want you eating their disgusting product. Find out why. (Chefelf)
8-30-02 Dead by Dawn: Yahtzee diversifies from reviewing horror movie sequels to an even more obscure genre: Erotic Thrillers! (Yahtzee)
8-29-02 Embassy Blues - Part Two: Jacques’s situation grows slightly more complex, in a festering sort of way. (Jacques)
8-28-02 Can You |
