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Interesting Things About Amber

Disclaimer: These are actual notes from my geology class. Much of it was inspired by a comment my teacher made regarding "the interesting things about amber". Please excuse my apparent insanity as simple fatigue / ennui.

Laura Redcloud
Geology Notes

erosion-wearing away rock (see: glam) by water, wind, ice, currants, earth, and love.
regolith-umbrella term for sediment. (nothing to do with umbrellas)
bored now.

humus? look into this.

buying clear nail polish doesn't make you gay.


Interesting Things About Amber.

  • Amber is often found in the Dominican Republic.
  • The most rare variety is red.
  • Her eyes aren't really hazel. She wears color contacts.
  • She is a fluke.
  • She only owns one cup.
  • Her life expectancy is calculated in semesters. No one knows why.
  • She came in third in the International Spitting Contest.
  • She predates rocks.
  • She keeps her socks in a box.
  • Her pet ladybug is six years old.
  • She knows no beer.
  • She is intensely flammable.
  • She is fed up.
  • She has never had a portrait done of herself, but if she ever does, she plans to call it an "amberscape".
  • Hunger makes her eloquent.
  • She tamed the calypso beast.
  • She can hear grapes scream.
  • She has been known to bum out dogs.
  • She can talk to bats. But she may not.
  • She was born with an arthritic monkey on her back.
  • One year, the only dirt she ate was imported from Budapest.
  • She can convert pizza into gold.
  • She is a volcanic FOX!

In summation: I don't do well in early morning classes. Also, Amber has powerful pizza magic. Goodnight, ladies and gentleman.


- Laura

I'm serious. There's nothing else. Go away.

Turn back now!

Okay, you got me. There's more.

No there isn't. I lied.

Or did I?

Bonus Geology Feature!

Listen to me pronouncing the terms one can use to describe the luster of a mineral.

Metallic Lusters

Non-Metallic Lusters