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    Accredited US Universities with Silly Names

    Thinking of going to college, but not sure which .edu will look funniest in an email address? Paul's guide will help you decide.

    Life University

    Before you decide to go to Life University, you should keep in mind that after graduation, you will not be able to get a job. Try telling an interviewer "I went to the University of Life." It's like saying "I do not have a college education," but worse, because it will inevitably be followed by an Abbot and Costello routine in which you try to convince the interviewer that that's a real college. Even bringing in your diploma won't help because a diploma that says "Life University" looks like one of those gag items like the covers of Time Magazine with your face on it and a big bloody X over your head. Those don't get you jobs anymore... employers are wise to that.

    Also keep in mind that Life U. is a school for chiropractors. Do you want to be a chiropractor?

    Butler University

    I know what you're thinking... I thought it was cool too, until I found out it's just a crappy liberal arts school and not a vocational school for butlers.

    Maharishi University of Management

    Again, a disappointment. I went to http://www.mum.edu/ and right on the front page there were people levitating! Now that's what I'm looking for in an accredited university.

    Maharishis

    But on closer inspection they are probably just playing that game where you sit in the lotus position and jump around like a dork. Here's a quick chart to show what I think of that:

    Things that it's worth four years of my life to learnThings that it's not worth four years of my life to learn
    LevitationHow to sit in the lotus position and jump around like a dork

    Philander University

    Yes!! Now this is the school for me: somewhere where I can learn to chat up, flirt, lead on, coquet, romance, disport, proposition, vamp, and dally with the ladies. I used to think every college was like this, based on a movie I saw during the month that we had free Cinemax. In real life, though, sometimes they make you write papers and not all of the professors are leggy brunettes with their hair in a bun who loll about on the desk and make double entendres involving the phrases "extra credit" and "grading on a curve".

    Hamline University

    I don't know why, I just think Hamline is a funny name. It sounds like a collection of really fat Rockettes. Or an initiation rite where fifty William Shatners hit you on the ass with a paddle. Either way it's four years well spent.

    Accredited US Universities with Rockin' Names

    I'd like to close this article out with a list of the 5 rockin'est universities in the US:

    HendrixHendrix U.
    RollinsRollins U.
    RushRush U.
    BowieBowie U.
    MadonnaMadonna U.

    ... and the least rockin' university in the US:

    WheatonWheaton U.

    *

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