• Ninjas and Pirates Tested in a Variety of Everyday Situations
  • The Inconsistently Detailed Episode Guide for The Sentinel, Season 1
  • Relationship Checklist
  • Emmy Fever! - Part One
  • Fighting the Good Fight
  • Why it Would Kick Arse to be an RPG Character
  • Features

    Message BoardMessage Board
    Buy StuffBuy Stuff
    Lance and EskimoL&E Home


  • Tegrisome
  • The Totally Unauthorized Dune Guy Website!
  • Flash

  • Videotape Living Will
  • A New L&E Promo
  • Fun

  • Quest for the Crown: Official Strategy Guide
  • Where Are You Going When You Die?
  • Books

  • Chefelfs Notes: The Cat Who Walks Through Walls
  • Zabibah and the King and Jacques
  • Contributing Writers

    Problems I have with The Big Bang Theory

    by srmoore

    Big BangFirst a little background on me. I am not a creationist. I'm probably more in the safe gray area of agnostic. Being agnostic is kind of like always wearing shades of gray, so you don't have to worry about color coordination. I am also an engineer. So you would think that I would just accept the Big Bang Theory because scientists say that's what they figured out.

    So what is the Big Bang (or "BB", as I will call it, because I am lazy)? Well, it is one way of thinking how the universe started. We feel the universe has a starting point because we are linear beings and feel that there must be a start and a finish to everything. I don't know why, we just do. Anyway, back to the BB Theory (or "BBT," as I will call it, because I am really lazy).

    The BBT says that all matter in the universe was in one tight compact little ball whose mass was great enough to cause it to explode, spewing out matter and star dust. This space crap then started to clump together, kind of like milk does when you put in fruit flavors when trying to get, for instance, a strawberry steamed milk (SSM). Unlike the SSM, the clumps that formed after the BB eventually became things like stars, and planets, and meteors, and the like. Eventually the stars made new elements because they work on fusion, and new elements then got from dead stars to planets, and so on and so forth until you get higher life forms like Charlize Theron.

    This is all fine and good. I can accept all the coincidence that it takes to make Ms. Theron alive on this planet, just as I can hope that one day I will be married to her. I like Charlize Theron. I wouldn't mind dying in some way with her either (well, in some good way, anyway). But here we start to see some of the problems with the BBT. The universe is expanding. This makes sense, as it was all blown apart from a central point. I believe that they have not yet shown evidence of it slowing, which means that it will not all someday fall back on itself, crushing Ms. Theron and I together closer than I could have ever dreamed. (damn!) Which means that there will be no Big Bang 2: The Sequel (or BB2:TS). So that makes me wonder. For all the matter in the universe to come together like that, that means it just had to be adrift aimlessly for gravity to make it all come together into one spot. Actually I think it also means that it had to not be moving at all. On top of this, it can't have been over an infinite area in space, because then it would be theoretically possible that they were situated in such a manner that the gravitation effects on all the particles of matter were equal to zero.

    What does this all mean? Well, it means that this matter had to be motionless in a finite area. Ok, lets just say that is possible. So where did it come from? Well you can't create matter, according to smart physic types. Does that mean that this crap was just floating in space, waiting to be crunched together? That doesn't sit well with me. It had to come from somewhere, doesn't it? I have a theory that covers that though.

    We will call it SRMoore's Universal Creation Rumor (SUCR for short). Lets just say that there is another universe where they have all this stuff figured out. In this amazing world one of the first things they figured out was black holes. Now, what would you do if you found out how to make something that took up no space and just kept absorbing matter? That's simple -- build a self-emptying trashcan! At the bottom is a small black hole, so you can keep throwing stuff into it. Well, what happens when you put so much matter in it that the gravitational field collapses? You'll get a small big bang in the bottom of your trashcan. Your very own universe to play and tinker with.

    So, this article highlighted some of my problems with the BBT. "So why don't you just think God did all this to screw with your mind?" you may ask. Well, I'll try and answer that next time in "Problems I have with God -- err -- Creationism."



  • Please "Flush". Thank's.
  • Windows XP Part 4
  • Paul's L&E Dream Mansion
  • The Worst Film Ever
  • Contributing Writers

  • Deck the Halls with Christmas Carol Ratings: Part I (Papa Redcloud)
  • How Long Would it Take to Kill Bill Gates with an Axe? (Paul, Nate, Rory)
  • Favorites

    Polymorph Want a Cracker?Polymorph
    Anonymous BlondeAnonymous Blonde
    Fully Ramblomatic.comFullyRamblomatic.com


  • Lance and Eskimo Comix
  • Company X #011
  • Company X # 023
  • Quizzes

  • Can You Take Me to the Prom?
  • Are You a Serial Killer?
  • Fiction

  • Trent Pistachio In: The Case of the Undulating Ungulant
  • Once Upon a Time in the House of Gerard Depardieu
  • L&E Comix

  • Lance and Eskimo Comic Strip: Logic Problem
  • Eskimo's Date