7-15 The War

Summary by: Dennis

Orginal Air Date: 2000-02-11

Writer: Allison M. Gibson

Director: William Russ

Capsule Summary: A series of pranks escalates to all out war among the gang.

Extendo Summary: It all starts when Rachel comes home to her dorm to the two couples, Angela & Shawn and Cory & Topanga, doing what they normally do. (Angela and Shawn making out, Cory and Topanga reading magazines not even being close to sexually promiscuous). She’s upset because her new job as RA isn’t a great as she expected, and someone stole her parking spot. After some teasing on the part of Cory and Shawn, and the revelation that it was Shawn who stole her spot, Rachel kicks the boys out of her dorm, but not the girls. Cory promises, “You are gonna be sorry, home wrecker!” and storms out. As revenge, Cory and Shawn manage to get Rachel’s car into her dorm and sets off the alarm to wake her up in the morning.

      Rachel and Angela get Feeny to punish Cory and Shawn. Feeny does not, instead, in a very un-Feeny-like reaction, finding Cory and Shawn’s antics hilarious. Because Rachel could not get her revenge that way, she and Angela assures Cory, “This means war.” Cory and Shawn are less than threatened, and unimpressed when the girls drench them with bottled water as a “preview.” Topanga then enters and promptly sides with her hubby, because she knows how good they are. Then, the draft begins. Both sides tussle over Jack at his apartment, with Rachel eventually getting him with the aid of her “cookies” (i.e. seduction). Neither side wants Eric, but Eric is too dumb to realize that no one wants him. He then tells each side that he’s a spy, lacking any sort of tact in doing so.

      The next day, in Feeny’s class, tensions run high. Somehow, all seven of them are in the same class. Feeny’s lesson is about the civil war, making it predictably applicable to the scenario. After class, Eric is still upset about the feud between his friends, especially when Angela and Shawn can only kiss under the condition that their hands are up. Rachel reveals her retaliation, having glued Topanga, Cory, and Shawn to their seats. She then pulls a mysterious chain and exits with Eric, Jack, and Angela. Suddenly, honey pours on the three of them. The three of them, however, are only impressed with the stunt when a bear finds its way into the room. Tearing their pants, the three dive out the window to safety. When they tell Feeny, he doesn’t care. Topanga really wants revenge, but Shawn and Cory are inexplicably silent.

      Presumably the next day, Cory and Shawn are on the couch when their opposition enters. After exchanging taunts, their next plan is revealed. They have hung up a giant picture of Rachel in a seductive pose in the Student Union. Rachel is genuinely hurt, and Angela and Jack are upset they took it too far, as well. Secrets are revealed, that Shawn lied to Angela to get the photo, and Jack had (long ago) betrayed Rachel’s trust by telling Shawn about the picture. So now everyone is mad at each other. Topanga enters, but she had nothing to do with it. She agrees Cory took it too far, but is upset nonetheless because he concocted the scheme with Shawn and not her. So now, everyone is mad at each other, but probably Rachel the most of all, who feels like these people aren’t really her friends. The next scene in Cory & Topanga’s bedroom only drives they’re quarrels in to the viewers more.

      In Shawn, Jack, and Eric’s apartment, Jack and Shawn eat in silence. Eric intervenes, doing his best to patch things up. He suggests they need a dialogue, but that doesn’t work. He then goes on a hunger strike that lasts about half a minute. Annoyed, Shawn cruelly yells at Eric that nobody wanted him. Hurt, Eric walks away. Finally, the episode ends with a scene essentially consisting of everyone yelling “I’m not talking to you!” at everyone else. Topanga bitingly asks Shawn, “why don’t you make a toast?” when he reminds her they were on the same team. And the episode ends with everyone mad at each other. To be continued…

Quotes:

"Alright, here’s a lesson: relax. Take a nice drive... into your closet."  --Mr. Feeny

"You’ve never tangled with Rachel McGuire, before!"  --Rachel

"I’ve never seen our favorite red head so fiery. I like it."  --Cory

Highlights:

  • Cory being lewd:
    Cory: "Shawnie, you don’t understand what I got here. I mean, once you start up this engine, it’s nonstop to Puerto Rico."
    Angela: (Sarcastic) "Oh, well isn’t he romantic."
    Topanga: "I don’t even know what he’s talking about."
    Cory: "That’s right. Papa don’t make sense."
  • Shawn: "Well I am shocked and dismayed." Cory: "Well, no, you can’t be both. You’ll be shocked, I’ll be dismayed." (To Topanga) "Wifey! We’re leaving. Walk behind me."
  • The car in Rachel’s dorm... still don’t know how they did that... [Traditional wisdom suggests they took it apart piece by piece and reassembled it in her room, but who among their number is sufficiently knowledgeable about auto mechanics? But I suppose not everything has to WORK... - Laura]
  • More Cory & Shawn taunts:
    Cory: "A car?"
    Cory & Shawn: "In your room?"
    Shawn: "Isn’t that a violation of dorm rules?"
    Cory: "Y’know, we should report her to the authorities."
    Shawn: "But she is the authorities." (They look at each other)
    Cory & Shawn: (To Rachel, yelling) "There’s a car in your room, lady!"
  • Cory: "Cory and Shawn are undefeated in matters such as these." (To Shawn) "Did you see how I referred to myself in the third person for emphasis?"
    Shawn: "I thought that was a nice touch."
    Cory: "Cory did, too."
  • Eric: "Do I get cookies?" Rachel: "No." Eric: "How about a cracker?" Rachel: "Nothin’." Eric: "Mutton?"
  • Feeny: (To class) "The civil war was one of the darkest moment in the history of our nation." (The seven look around suspiciously at each other) "Once united, we were now on the precipice of a terrible conflagration, which would cast friend against friend, and brother against brother."
    Eric: (Stands) "Mr. Feeny, this war must be stopped!"
    Feeny: "Your passion for the material is admiral, Mr. Matthews, but not to worry. The civil war was fought over 100 years ago."
    Eric: "Oh, no one cares about that crap, I’m talking about now!"
  • When Jack, outraged, tears down the huge picture of Rachel, there is another behind it. He tears it down, and there is another behind that one. He does it again, only to see another. Frustrated, he moves a crying Rachel to block the picture.
  • Jack: "Once, alright, when we were still dating a long time ago. Only because he showed me a picture of Angela."
    Angela: "Hey!" (Slaps Shawn) "You show him that?"
    Cory: (Stands) "Hey!" (Slaps Shawn) "How come I never get to see nothin’?"
  • Cory, when Topanga turns her back to him: "Oh, great. The butt."
  • Eric the peacekeeper:
    Eric: "Alright, look, I’m glad you’re both here. Listen to me. I’ve been reading a lot about this guy named Gandhi. Now Gandhi’s an Indian. He’s a Cherokee, I think, but that’s not really what’s important. Gandhi is a master at solving all conflicts peacefully. Now the first thing we need to do is start a dialogue." (Looks at Jack, who says nothing. Then Shawn, who also remains silent.) "Okay, to have a dialogue somebody has to talk." (Looks in his book) "Somebody has to talk, yeah. So who’s gonna go first?"
    Jack: (To Shawn) "Ah, to hell with you, man."
    Eric: "Now that’s good. Let’s build from that."
    Shawn: (To Jack) "To hell with you, too."
    Eric: "I don’t think you guys are getting it. So I’m gonna skip right ahead to the next chapter." (Opens book) "Which is, of course, the hunger strike. I will not eat or drink until the two of you make up okay go hummmmmmmmm..." (Eyeing Shawn’s burger) "Looks good. Got a cheeseburger, there?" (Eyeing Jack’s pie) (Cartman voice) "Havin’ a little bit of pie?" (Regular voice) "It’s fine, it’s fine." (To self) "Yummmmmmm... Oh I am so freakin' hungry!" (Takes burger from Shawn and devours it)

    Error: Disassembling and reassembling an entire car so that at least the car alarm still worked would probably take more than one night.

    Fun Facts: Surprising, this episode marks the second time a live bear has been on Boy Meets World. The first was “Security Guy”.

    Eric Is… Special Hints: Eric tries to twist off the top of a can

    Episode Themes: Cory and Topanga Trouble, Dumb Eric

    Rating: 3.  It doesn’t quite deserve a 4, but get oh-so many brownie points for setting up “Seven the Hard Way”. Eric was the funniest in it, and he probably saved it from being much, much worse. Feeny was also uncharacteristically funny. (I'd also give it half a point for the bear, but there are no half points in the Boy Meets World Rating System... anymore. -Laura)

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My head is full of silly ideas that in no way reflect the ideas or opinions of the cast, crew, producers or affiliates of the show Boy Meets World, with which I am not affiliated. Likewise, my opinions do not necessarily reflect those of Lance and Eskimo Enterprises and its affiliates, although they may reflect the individual opinions of Lance and/or Eskimo.