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The Plot... A jet full of CIA information has been pilfered by a lunatic with good intentions (Anthony Quinn). With the help of a private weapons hacker, the PMRC hopes to reclaim the stolen computer chips and return them to their native land. The NCAA, with the assistance of Austin Botchgood (Ben Affleck), must jet ski through the rain forest to deliver the stolen thermo-nuclear explosives in a timely manner to the Argentinian government. And if this wasn't enough, he has a smidge less than 12 hours to do it. With the assistance of a grizzled marine (Bruce Willis), the good guy must mountain bike through the rain forest to return the borrowed thermo-nuclear explosives safely to the English government. The Predicament worsens as he realises that his wife (Catherine Zeta-Jones) has been carjacked by the evildoers. Also you see the zany antics of a smart alec black man (Dave Chapelle) who when kidnapped by the the bad guys says: "What kinda FUCKED up place is this?!?!" It will prove difficult because an old rival with a score to settle (Al Pacino) has secrets regarding his sordid past. Just as our hero are departing on their suicidal mission, they stupidly lapse into a sing-along of Love that Dirty Water much to the embarrassment of PETA . In the eleventh hour the President recites a speech to the peoples of the world. While this dramatic grandstanding happens he says: "Mankind is a creature of survival. This is the dawn of a new tomorrow." An FBI explosives specialist watching at home answers this with: "He better be right... for our sake."
Coming next summer. Rated PG-13 Projected Critic Rating: |
