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The Plot... A donkey train full of lethal poisonous gas has been pilfered by the most dangerous terrorist in the world (Gene Hackman). With the help of a contracted computer specialist, the NCRP hopes to intercept the hijacked goods and get them back to their native land. PETA, with the assistance of Carter Botchwright (Ed Begely, Jr.), must mountain bike through the rain forest to deliver the hijacked nuclear warheads safely to the English people. And if it wasn't hard enough, he has a smidge less than 15 minutes to do it. With the help of an old stick in the mud (Jon Voight), the good guy must skateboard through the rain forest to return the stolen CIA information safely to the American people. All this worsens as he figures out that his wife (Angelina Jolie) has been working with the the villain. Also there is the screwball antics of a jive talkin' soul brother (Dave Chapelle) who when kidnapped by the the bad guys says: "All I know is when I get out of this here cell I'm gonna kick whitey's ass!" However this will prove difficult because a cop with a vendetta (Al Pacino) has secrets regarding his sloppy criminal record. Just as the good guy are setting out on their dangerous journey, they poorly all burst into a sing-along of Magic Carpet Ride much to the dismay of PETA . At the final moment the President recites a speech to the peoples of the world. While this moment of truth unfolds he says: "When I took office, they never told me THIS would happen. Drop the bombs, Commander." An FBI explosives specialist in the crowd answers this with: "He better be right... for our sake."
Coming this winter. Rated PG-13 Projected Critic Rating: |
